I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize
