It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
