I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
