They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
