...so i touched it.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Randomize
