You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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