you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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