I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
