I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
