Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
He has the fingertips of a God
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize