absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
nutella sex= disaster
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
