Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize