Yo dont text me then not text me
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
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