I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
