Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Randomize
