T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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