hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
You're so nebulous sometimes
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Randomize
