I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Are we still banned from the library?
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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