1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize