she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
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