I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Randomize
