you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
