He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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