I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Randomize
