Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize
