Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Randomize
