im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Well I just put wine in my tea
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
