i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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