i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Randomize
