I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize