yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Can vaginas get frostbite?
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
