I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
