why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
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