: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize
