How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
You have to summon your inner elephant
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
