After last night, I could never be a politician.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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