Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
do herpes really smell.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
