im drinking this country out of the recession.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
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