your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
