To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize
