OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I'm too high and old for this...
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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