I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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