sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
so let's talk penis.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
