She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
