For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
