i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Randomize
