yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize