We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
