:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
