I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
