My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Randomize
