OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize
