I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize